Monday, September 19, 2011

your birthmother

 i always stop and think of your birth mother around your birthday
i know she must be thinking of you too
three years ago she made a heart wrenching decision
one i can't understand
but, i am so thankful for
her heartbreak brought my heart great joy
and i hope and pray she feels some kind of peace today
it's a strange place to feel like you are eternally in debt to someone you've never met and will never meet
part of me wants to hug her, invite her over for sweet tea, and tell her about how great you are
and the bigger part of me is so grateful for the ocean that separates us
and so, i will just pray for her
and raise you with a strong sense of self
to teach you the unconditional love of Jesus
and i know you will grow up to do remarkable things in your life
you will live a life she would be proud of
and i'm already proud of
now at 3 years old
36 months of life
you have been with me longer than you were in the orphanage
and, i am thankful for that huge milestone
that you've known my touch longer than the months of loneliness
that you've known my voice longer than the silence 

you've known our family longer than your crib mates
and now, you know you are loved
abundantly loved

6 comments:

Betsy said...

Ok, that was so touching...there might have been tears in my eyes. So sweet! (And Molly looks super cute, as usual)

groovy mama said...

I totally know how you feel, as i think of Ella birthmom and the 4 hour drive she made to leave her in a 'safe' place! Hugs on this day!
Donna

Suzanne said...

Ok, you are really going to need to start attaching Kleenex with your entries!!! :)
It looks like Miss Molly's #3 was full of delight. Absolutely loved the party!! You already have me thinking about Cate's 6th and it's not until March! :)

Hope you're doing well.
Blessings,
Suzanne

caryn said...

Beautiful post!

Becky said...

It is certainly something to think about, isn't it? I am thankful we have had the chance to know both biological families of the children we have adopted. It has given us a chance to have a glimpse of what was and what might have been with them had they remained. It has not always been easy, but I am still thankful that their birth parents knew where they were and knew they were cared for and loved. I am thankful that you too have that poignant sense of knowing that somewhere, another mama is remembering.

Danielle Moss said...

BEAUTIFUL post, Amy. Happy belated bday Molly!

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